Dreaming Of Size 12

And so the end has come, the Olympic stadium is being dismantled, probably even at this very moment. What a summer! I had the very great privilege of attending the Paralympics, and watching, amongst other things, blind long jump, and wheelchair racing. The crowd roared for everyone, and the victory ceremonies made me cry! I loved our day at the Olympic stadium. The sun shone, everyone was happy and friendly, the transport was fantastically well organised, and when it went a bit wrong, well that was ok too.

So what of the legacy? Well I can only tell you what that is for me. A newly discovered love of sport for a start. I have never been all that keen on team sports. Not as a spectator, and definitely not as a participant. So no one was more surprised than me when I decided to have a go at playing hockey a few weeks ago. I went along to a summer taster session and had great fun, and planned on joining that club, starting from this week ( as I had to shuffle my shifts at work to make it happen). Of course a gap of some weeks meant I lost some of the momentum that drove me there in the first place, so it was with a huge element of trepidation that I drove myself there this Tuesday. I sat in the car for a while, bracing myself to smile, look confident and join in. Sitting there was a mistake in many ways, because it allowed me to notice that all I could see was large numbers of fit young women. Very young. I was plenty old enough to be their mother as far as I could tell. And my courage ebbed away, and I never got out of the car. I am such a wimp!

But there is a happy ending to this story. My lovely neighbour plays hockey at a different club, and she had mentioned to me that they were looking for new members, so I went and knocked on her door. And so tonight I went with her, and I got out of the car and joined in, worked hard, got breathless and sweaty, and found that I do like team sports, after all.

The (wet) day has dawned, it’s 1 year since I set out on this particular journey to lose weight and get fit. And as promised, I have dived into the gym for the sole purpose of weighing myself on the same scales that I have been keeping an eye on since leaving Slimming World. I have also whipped out my trusty tape measure and taken a fresh set of measurements, so here come the stats.

Weight: starting weight was 21st 3lbs. Today I weigh 14st 12lbs ( I was 5lb lighter at my doctors surgery earlier this week, but in the name of fairness and honestly I have to use today’s number!) Total loss is 6st 5lbs (or 89lbs)
I don’t know whether it is cheating to mention that my total loss since the very beginning of this blog is 8 stone, give or take a pound or so….)

Measurements: 9.5 inches from my bust, 7 inches round my ribcage, 9 inches from my waist and a staggering 14 inches from my hips.

So I didn’t make the 100lb target, which I am not surprised by because my eye has been well and truly off the ball over the summer holidays. There has been cake, ice cream, cold cider, and even caramel frappe latte (where have you been all my life?!) because that is what happens on sunny days out. But the fact that I have maintained my weight in spite of things like that is, to me, a triumph in it’s own right.

Although weight loss is the name of the game, it is important to recognise that it isn’t just about the numbers on the scale. More importantly, it is about health and fitness. 12 months ago I began all this by deciding to attempt Couch to 5k. I stopped talking about it because I stopped doing it. I was rescued from that torture when I met Ian, who trained me to my current level of fitness using mainly weights and suchlike. However when it dawned on me how close my anniversary was, I decided to give C25k another shot. I never even completed week 2 first time around. 90 second bursts of jogging. They were killing me. So I have been quietly adding some serious treadmill time into my gym sessions, and this time I have made much better progress. Yesterday I should have completed the final run of week 5. The second run of week 5 consists of 5 minutes walking to warm up, then 2 lots of 8 minutes running punctuated by a further 5 minute walk inbetween, and again to finish. I achieved that, much to my amazement. But I went into run 3 scared. Run 3 is a 20 minute run with no break. That is a big jump up from 8 minutes isn’t it? So even as I was consciously repeating to myself “I can do this, I can do this”, the little voice in my head was insisting that I can’t. And after 12 minutes running, I just stopped. I honestly believe my body could have kept on going if my mind hadn’t shouted it down. Never mind, I will do it this week, I promise!

I followed my treadmill “failure” with pretty much the worst training session I have ever done, presumably because I had just labelled myself a failure. I couldn’t lift the weights I have been chucking around quite happily for months. Literally, I couldn’t do it. My arms felt dead. And I was not fasting yesterday so can’t blame that. In fact the food I had eaten earlier on the day felt heavy in my stomach and I felt quite sick a lot of the time. I feel I am losing direction in the gym and I really really need a session with a trainer to bring some focus back. Roll on September when I can do something about that!

So, as much as I would have loved this particular post to be all jubilant and positive, life just isn’t playing along with that idea. But that’s ok too. Theres nothing to regret in any of this post. It’s what it is, and I am still happy, still doing my best 80% of the time, and come September, I will still be losing weight.

Just a quick update, if you were planning on trying any of the Join In website sessions. Phone the organisers of the events! 3 out of 3 events I have signed up for are not actually happening! I would hate people to turn up somewhere and find nothing happening!

Have you loved watching the Olympics, and wished you could have a try of all of those amazing sports, but don’t know where to start? Happily someone has had the idea of harnessing our enthusiasm and you can find taster sessions for all sorts of sports on the Join In website. So far I have signed up for athletics and rowing! I love the fact that I feel excited about sport, finally, at 45 years old! That is the legacy that London 2012 has left for me.

I promised that I would report back on my experiment with intermittent fasting. I have done it 3 times now, each time on an exercise day. The first time I tried it, I found my strength to be reduced, but cardio was fine. But I have had off days before so couldn’t wholly attribute it to the fast. Therefore I had a second attempt. This time I made it through all my weights, bar a couple of reps on the last exercise. But the following day I hurt! I had aches where I haven’t ached for months, and didn’t do anything unusual to cause it. Day 3 was yesterday and my strength was definitely without question reduced, so now my plan is to shift the fast days away from the exercise days and see how that affects things. Obviously I am just one person, and my experience is not scientific evidence of anything at all. We all need to find what works for us individually.

I was weighed at my GP surgery this morning during my annual hypertension review. I have lost 43kgs since last time. I think it is safe to say they are pleased with me My official one year weigh in and measurements will be on Sunday.

UK readers may have seen the Horizon programme on monday night called Eat, Fast and Live Longer (currently available on BBC iPlayer or YouTube )

I watched with interest, mainly because I have seen intermittent fasting promoted on paleo and primal sites, but it hasn’t really registered as something that might interest me before. The programme was made very watchable by the slightly delicious (my iPad just autocorrected delicious to odious!) Michael Mosely. The aim, for him, was to find out what role diet can play on maintaining good health into old age. Michael was told from quite early in the programme that he was carrying 30% fat around his abdomen, and was thus at high risk of diabetes and cardiovascular disease. But this part of the programme lost credibility for me because he was then compared to a man of his age who was living a calorie restricted lifestyle and for whom, it was claimed, it would be impossible to suffer a cardiovascular event. That is of course a ridiculous statement. In the first place, low risk is not zero risk. There is no zero risk, he is alive, therefore there is risk. We don’t know everything, this is why there is still medical research. If we knew everything, they could stop researching! Anyway, before I give you the full rant on that ridiculous statement, I will move on.

After meeting tiny mouse and his massive brother, destined for early death, Michael embarked upon a 3 day fast that looked utterly miserable. Clearly if this is what it would take to live a longer life, any sane person would choose early death. Blood tests done before and after the fast did appear to be remarkable, showing improved blood sugar, cholesterol and IGF-1. We learnt that high levels of IGF-1 are associated with increased risk of cancer, and are influenced by protein consumption, but reduced by fasting. It was explained that high IGF-1 causes our cells to constantly renew, but when reduced, they slow down and actually start to repair instead of renew, which is good, apparently.

Clearly Michael was keen to reap the benefits of fasting, but naturally couldn’t see himself doing it for days on end, so he set out to find out if there was an easier way. And thank god, there is. He was introduced to the 5:2 way, in other words eat normally for 5 days a week, fast for 2 days. The definition of “normally” may have been a tad exaggerated, since they showed a fast food feast at this point, and I don’t think anyone would claim that is a terribly good idea really. The technical details of the fast are pretty simple: 24 hours from one meal to the next, be it breakfast one day to breakfast the next, or any other point in the day of your choice. And then you may consume a limited calorie meal. I think it was 400 calories for women, 500 for men. I’d need to watch again to check that.

Our brave and handsome presenter went back to his daily life (and lovely wife and family, dammit!) as he tried this new regime for several weeks. He chose to start each day of fasting with a decent breakfast. I would choose differently, but that’s one of the beauties of the plan, flexibility. At the end of the programme, his blood tests etc were repeated and were again impressive, with much less effort than the 3 day fast. Additionally he lost over a stone in weight. Impressive figures for a man who wasn’t too shabby to start with. So the conventional advice of eating little and often is brought into question then, since stopping eating for reasonably long periods is so demonstrably beneficial.

As with all things, it comes down to “do your own research” I think. There is so very much written about diet, nutrition and health, it becomes impossible to know what to think. After doing a little more reading, I have decided there is nothing to lose by trying this, and there is no time like the present. Last night I caved into a bit of a chocolate binge. I wish I hadn’t, but since I did I may as well use the remorse to power myself through a fast. As I am the sort of person who can happily skip breakfast, I have decided that my 24 hour fast began when I stopped pigging out last night and will end with my evening meal tonight. It will actually be a little short of 24 hours, but I don’t like eating too late in the evening. It is now around 1:45pm and I am feeling ok. I have had hunger pangs, but a drink seems to squash them, at least for now. I am about to go to the gym. I don’t know whether this is wise or not, but it will stop me thinking about food for an hour. At least I hope it will….. Since I am not particularly using scales at the moment, and obviously won’t be having a raft of blood tests, this is all going to come down to how I feel in myself. If I feel good, I will repeat it. If not, never again. Either way, I will report back. Unless I die of hunger while I’m at the gym.

I was walking past my bedroom mirror the other day, when I noticed that my legs looked slimmer. Interesting! I have always had the fattest calves in the actual universe, so to suddenly see an improvement is a milestone to celebrate. Obviously I had to whip out my trusty tape measure to verify what i could see, and yes, I have indeed lost several centimetres from each calf. Suddenly the possibility of buying nice boots is opening up before me! Ok, not quite yet, but eventually! And dresses! I may even be able to wear a dress that isn’t a maxi dress, and without leggings! I’m going to be like a real girl soon.

Other non scale related evidence that things are still moving in the right direction: my wedding ring is too big, my trousers are all suddenly too long (and I’m going to assume I haven’t got any shorter!) and I definitely need new ( smaller ) underwear.

In spite of the school holidays, I am currently still managing to hit the gym a couple of times a week, and I am going all out when I am there, more about that at a later date though. My food isn’t perfect, it isn’t often easy on days out to get the right kind of food. We went to an Olympic football match (USA v DPR Korea) and I ended up caving in and eating a pie and drinking Coke. We were there for absolutely hours and there really wasn’t a healthy option! When we go to the Olympic Stadium to see the Paralympic athletics, I am hoping there will be better choices than were available at Old Trafford. I am not planning on dragging a healthy picnic to London and on the tube at rush hour, that’s for certain, so what will be will be. But I am striving to be good most of the time, and I am pretty happy with how things are going, even though today I had ice creammmmmmmmmmm!

Before I go, a handy hint that I learned last night. You can use Tesco Clubcard vouchers to buy railcards! I saved myself £28 last night, using £14 worth of vouchers to renew my Family and Friends railcard. Which in turn saves me loads of money when I buy train tickets. It’s only costing £40 for me and Rebecca to get to London using a happy combination of railcard and early booking. In fact I think the return part of the journey is a mere tenner. Thus our visit to the Olympic Stadium is costing £65 which I think is a massive bargain. Everyone should buy Paralympic tickets. They are much cheaper, easier to get hold of (getting tickets for the Olympics should be made into an Olympic event in itself, it’s near impossible!) and it is going to be awesome!

Olympic Nails

What sort of blogger would I be if I failed to mention the Olympics, currently taking place and inspiring me all day long.

My absolute favourite event is the gymnastics. So much strength. So much balance. So much speed and power. So much potential for absolute catastrophe. I love that the gymnasts do things that seem impossible to the average human. Imagine being able to do a hands free backflip from a stationary start, on a balance beam! I can’t tell you how much I would love to be there to watch in person, rather than having to rely on what the BBC cameras choose to show me. I don’t need to watch a gymnast bandaging her foot, while hearing rapturous applause and gasps of delight from the audience who can see another gymnast performing!

I have also loved the cycling this weekend, congratulations to Lizzie Armitstead for winning a silver medal on Sunday, in truly horrible weather conditions. I probably only got to the gym on Saturday because I was so inspired by Fabian Cancellara who crashed during the mens road cycle race, and was clearly in a lot of pain, yet went on to complete the race. I was feeling a bit queasy after too much wine the previous night, and that somehow seemed a weak excuse to be idle, so off I went and did an excellent work out, and shook off the hangover in the process so a double win!

Although it hasn’t been long yet, I am already missing having a personal trainer. I was enviously watching people working with their trainers this morning, and even though I worked as hard as ever, I felt a little bit lost. I think it’s because I am unsure how to progress or shake things up for myself. on the bright side, I am managing to get to the gym during school holidays. And I think I have my next trainer sorted. I was chatting to the guy who owns the gym where my daughter does her kick boxing classes. It turns out that he does personal training, for less money than I was paying, and since he owns the gym he is fairly unlikely to leave any time soon. So come September I am going to try some sessions with him, see how they work out. Fingers crossed it will be perfect!

It’s been pretty hard to tell lately, but yes, summer is upon us. And right now the sky is clear and blue, the sun is shining. Oh, and its monday and I have a child In the house at 10am. That’s the biggest give away of all.

So this is the time of year when it’s really hard for me to get near the gym, and I am scared that all my hard work so far will result in nothing but memories and atrophied muscles by September. Obviously I can still exercise in other ways. We can go out on our bikes, we can go for walks in the peak district, and I can even resort to putting on an exercise DVD if I have to! And of course there is Wii Fit. But none of that is going to do a damn thing for maintaining all the work I have done to build lovely lean muscle. Oh well, I will just have to take what I can get and work twice as hard in September.

This particular weight loss journey began around the middle of August last year, during the school holidays in fact. I had a “little” 12 month goal in mind and now I have got to make a bit of an effort to achieve it. It may or may not be possible, from where i stand now it’s a challenge but I do like a challenge. Right now my total weight loss is 88lbs. I would love to say I lost 100lbs in a year. I think my anniversary date is 19th August, so that is my deadline. Whether I can go to exercise or not, that day I will pop into the gym and weigh myself….I’ve given myself butterflies in my tummy now, it’s a bit exciting! Luckily my motivation is as strong now as it was at the beginning. I wish I knew where it was coming from, I’d love to be able to sell the secret and live a life of luxury!

Right, I cant be wasting anymore of this gorgeous day sitting indoors. I’m going out to play!

Today I trained with Ian for the last time, as sadly he is leaving the gym. So this post is a tribute to him, because without him I doubt I’d even still be going to the gym, never mind enjoying it.

Ian taught me a lot. For a start, he taught me that I could lift things, that the free weights are not just there for the big scary testosterone fuelled men, they work for women too! And right there is the reason why I keep on going back to the gym, because I love lifting things, and making really visible progress. When I look in the mirror now, I can see muscles, especially around my shoulders. Not big hideous bulging muscles, but strong defined muscles nonetheless. Even though I still have a long way to go before I have the perfect body (whatever the hell that is!) I feel confident in myself now because I know that my body works well, although my balance still abandons me at times!

The second thing that I learned was that it’s ok to eat real food. It’s far better to eat real food than food with a “low fat” or “diet” label. I have spent countless years (yes I really am too old to count the years I’ve been dieting!) buying low fat yoghurt, diet drinks, low fat meat substitutes (that’s the biggest travesty right there!) and now I find that I not only can, but actually should, enjoy real food the way it is meant to be eaten. Fat is not the enemy. Processed, chemical filled, sugar laden food is the real enemy and is no longer a part of my diet. It was a massive leap of faith to do the opposite of what I have been taught my entire life, it was good to have someone there to encourage and reassure me.

Ian has spent a lot of time telling me about the effects of hormones on weight loss too, but really the only thing that has stuck with me there is that working nights causes a stress response in my body, raising cortisol levels and thus hindering my weight loss. Since that is not something I can change, instead it’s just something extra I have to fight against, and that’s ok. Hey, at least I can throw it out there as an excuse if I ever need to! Because of all the information Ian has chucked at me during my training sessions, I have gone away to do my own research and am therefore far more well read and informed than I was before, and I’ve enjoyed the process. Learning is always beneficial, and I have awakened my inner student I think. I suddenly find myself browsing the Open University website and wondering what direction I can take this studying in….

Finally, the most important lesson of all. Ian taught me that I can succeed. I believe that now in a way that I never have before. He has done more than change my body, he has changed my mind too.

Ian I wish you every success for the future, thanks for everything, you are a legend.